As all Y'all know, we had a broad stroke of inspiration and decided on driving to visit family for the holidays...this, as always, was a mistake. Makes one wonder what one could possibly have been thinking!
We did have a lovely time with family and friends, and were able to help out where we could, which made it all the better use of our vacation days. Little Bear gained his first tooth, and discovered that he can get around using the 'army crawl'. Monkey and Banana rediscovered that they are, in fact, the best buddies in the whole wide world, despite the obvious handicap of being brother and sister. And Jelly Bean, MY OWN JELLY BEAN, has walked right into puberty! (Her response to my enlightening her of her current disposition was "Oh Crap!") They grow up so fast! I love that at least for the purposes of celebrating the holidays, the family is together, all stopped from our usual business. But enough holidays already! I'm tired, and I can already see Easter on the horizon!
Today, for all you Catholics out there, is Three Kings Day: the official end of the Christmas season for us...Boy, howdy! Am I ever glad it is here! three gifts per child and a special, awesomely special, King Cake with Praline Filling! :D Y'all know how us Southern Girls love some Pralines!
But I am unsure as to whether or not we should be abstaining from meat, given that it's a Friday, or are forbidden from fasting because it's a feast day...will have to go to Catholic answers and check...
Back to the Christmas Visit: There was much discussion as to "The Talk" I had with my ten, almost eleven year old daughter. She has pit hair...poor kid! I cannot imagine the pain in the ass of having pit hair in the fifth grade! I have a theory that this odd phenomena of boys under-developing and girls over-developing has to do with all of the estrogen in our diets, thanks much in part to the sheer amount of soy fat in our current diets. Soy fat is pretty much just straight estrogen, so it's a theory in progress, but I swear it's why men are still whiney crybabies and girls have boobs and hips at a mere 10 years old. If not, then I'm voting that the useless men syndrome is due to a lack of fathers...women make very poor male role models, no matter how butch they are, so boys just remain children and the future wives of the world are destined to mother their husbands...yet another byproduct of the stupid feminist movement! (hate those stupid bitches!)
But I digress...as I do so often.
So, I'm talking with Jelly Bean About her pit hair, which naturally, leads to the discussion of "feelings" for boys and sexuality. She likes a boy: boy likes her. check...don't want any of that unnecessary pining for someone who's an ass, but who also doesn't like her back! She wants to kiss said boy, said boy wants to kiss her, too, but she is unsure if kissing is such a great idea.
My response: Your sexuality is a precious gift, and whatever little bit of it you give to someone else, you can never, ever get back. Best bet is to be sure that the person you're giving that bit of yourself to is worth it!
I'm not too quick to pat myself on the back over this parental move of 'good communication'. I also added to this the fact that I was very careless with my sexuality when I was young, and have been paying the price for my stupidity ever since. She thought about it for a second and decided that when she gave her first kiss away, she thinks she'll kiss her very best friend. So that there's very little chance of him crushing her heart to pieces and making her first kiss something she wishes she could forget. I agreed that this was as good a plan as any for the time being, but that it would be best if she could hold-out until she was married. She agreed that if it's possible for her to do so, for she would give her very best efforts, then she would never, ever be sorry for giving away her sexuality to the person she was married to. (WHEW!)
So, I took a cue from my therapist and let her come to the conclusion that her sexuality is for marriage all on her own. A decision made for oneself is always the most adhesive. I'm well aware that I cannot make my children's decisions for them, and in this day and age, you've got until they're 10-12 years old before they're out there making their own decisions, so you'd better learn to teach all those things no one bothered to teach you! I really love Jelly Bean, and I know that she's smart, loving, kind and generous. I also know that when it comes to the opposite sex, she is as shrewd as if the whole thing were a multi-billion dollar merger! Nobody's getting her kisses without a lengthy vetting process! (Her first kiss especially, now that she knows how priceless it is!)
So, that was how we rounded-out our holiday visit to grandma's house. We learned that we have become quite accustomed to zero humidity and blinding heat. We learned how to shave our armpits, and the various methods for controlling pit hair growth. We learned that kissing does fall into the realm of sexuality, and it should be taken very seriously by us as parents and by our children. We learned that three small children in a car for two days is a bad, bad, bad idea.
